Me.

Since I’ve been so open about our journey with infertility, I thought I’d give a brief update. After all, this is my blog, my memories and I do not want to forget this “season” of our life – the good and the bad.

We’ve had a lot go on the last few months – the Lord placed adoption on our hearts, we attended an Adoption Orientation in Orlando with an agency, I’ve done more research and looked at more information on adoption than I care to ever again, the Lord never gave us a peace about moving forward with adoption, we went back to our infertility doctor and asked “what’s next?”, insurance covers IUI (intrauterine insemination), and here we are….another FAILED cycle later. Gearing up for yet another one….

I honestly, don’t know what I’m doing. Am I just setting myself up for failure? The IUI that failed in September almost didn’t phase me. I guess that I’ve just come to prepare myself for the worse.

The has been a long, hard road….that I’m ready for it to be OVER. But, this is part of our story that HE is writing for us….we are told to trust and obey. I have my good days most of the time, but every once in a while, a bad day sneaks in there and the whole day I seem to think about…”I should be __ weeks pregnant now”, nursery plans this, car seats that….SHE’s pregnant again and I’m not, everyone else in the world seems pregnant and here goes another month that I’m not….

Like I said, we’re gearing up for another IUI, praying for this to go smoothly and for Clay and I to accept whatever outcome it is.